Friday, November 16, 2012

Can men and women be friends?

Friday, November 16, 2012
I was recently watching an episode of Wendy Williams and she posed the question: can men and women be friends?  I immediately thought: yes thinking of all my male relationships. Then I realized wait, all my male friends are either married or in committed relationships. Then I realized she meant can either sex be friends if a.) one is single and the other is not or b.) if both parties are single.

Hmmm. I don't know.

Take for example exhibit A my male and former best friend, C.  He says I'm his 3rd best friend. I've been demoted because I'm married. Anyway he's had a physical relationship with each of his single girlfriends. They cuddle and exchange saliva.

Exhibit B. My friend, J. She has a slew of male friends but wait . . . they are all interested in dating her, they have dated or she considers them prospective male companions.

Exhibit C. Myself. Last year my hubby confronted me about still bring friends with a former flame. My response: sometimes I get bored and want attention. What?! I was being completely honest. This man served no other purpose in my life other than to boost my ego when V wasn't willing to put up with my shenanigans. Needless to say I deleted his number shortly after.

So, in my opinion unless human beings are completely rewired and stop feeling attraction towards the opposite sex then no, men and women cannot be friends.

Think about it.  At some point you found yourself crushing on that "friend". It's true. When you're 16 the last thing you want is a friend of the opposite sex. You want to date the opposite sex. You only want to be friends or talk to the good looking people hoping to become more than friends.

When you're between the ages of 25 and 35 you're probably looking for your soul mate so no time to just be friends.

At the age of 40 most of your relationships are established. Why would you want more friends?

At the age of 50 the only reason you'd be looking to make more friends is because you're either going through a mid life crisis or a divorce.  In the end it's not really a friend you're looking for at all.  Is it?

I think that if you happen to be friends with someone of the opposite sex it is purely coincidental or you started off dating and are now friends but that hardly ever happens.

And have we not learned anything from rom-coms? If you spend enough time with said friend chances are you'll fall for each other.

So once again. I don't think men and women can be friends if A.) one of the parties is still single and B.) if both parties are single.

You can be friends if the single friend is friend of the couple.  That works for the most part.  I don't want to get into "my best friend stole my husband" horror stories.

What do you think?  Can men and women be friends?

I now leave you with my favorite "friends".

The cast of Friends nearly all dated each other. Monica had a crush on Joey when they first met. She went on to marry Chandler. Rachelle dated both Joey and Ross.

It's only a matter of time before Nick and Jess hook up.  

It was inevitable that Penny and Leonard would get together

Robin and Ted, Robin and Barney

Voice Your Choice: People's Choice Awards 2013

Bones and Booth

Gossip Girl.  I forgot who dated who but I think they've all slept with each other

Who are your favorite prime time friends turned couple?


  1. Yep men and women can be friends it's just rare, take sheldon for instance he and penny were friends when they were both single (if you can call them friends). I have a female friend who is single though saying that she did ask me out a while back. I do know a man and woman who are friends without any relationships, they just knew each other from a young age so they're almost relatives

    1. I think it's really rare but possible. All your scenarios made me laugh. Are penny and Sheldon friends? Does he have any? He's my favorite. Your friend asked you out, see? So she has no choice but to settle for a friendship now. Even though if you were to ask her out she may agree to it. Maybe. :)

    2. Well in the world of Sheldon I believe he classes Penny as a friend, I think there was an episode when he had to get rid of one of his friends to find a friendship space for Kripke. I'm going to add it to my bucket list to make a female friend who I don't fancy and they don't fancy me... I now know how Casanova went through all of those women, he just wanted to make friends and failed miserably at proving your theory wrong... poor guy. Thanks for your comments by the way, I shall be checking back to make sure you create a bucket list :-)

    3. lol . . . I need to start on the bucket list post ASAP!


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