Separate Assets, Separate lives?

Is it really fair to join all your assets once you get married?  Two become one, does that include bank accounts?  I acquired a significant debt while in grad school.  My husband worked three jobs to pay for his college tuition, why would I hold him accountable for my six figure school loan?   I want to drive a Mercedes, I pay for it.  Friends are always surprised to find that we have separate bank accounts, someone even referred to us as glorified roommates.  That's because we split all our bills.  We each cover our own expenses and anything we do together we divide evenly.  My husband keeps a spread sheet of all our expenses.  Every first of the month I give him what I owe.  I know it sounds strange, but it works. Even with my shopping problem we each have savings and we don't have any credit card debt.  That's because we hold each other accountable.  Do not buy anything if you can't afford it.  He's a lot riskier with his investments, I'm a bit more conservative.  Of course he tends to be a lot more conservative with his spending habits than me, but I think that's why he can afford to buy me awesome gifts!  When the children  come some things may have to change, but for now why should I have to give up my financial freedom?  Maybe once we have children we'll split them.  He'll cover the expenses for one and I'll cover the expenses for the other.  If we have a third we'll split it down the middle.

String Quartet at our wedding, it was beautiful.  

Marriage

The hardest adjustment was realizing that I was no longer dependent on my parents.  I was on my own.  With a man.  It was crazy!  I remember telling my dad:"it's so weird that I have to share a bed with a man and wake up next to him."  Yes, my dad and I talk about things.  He's the one who told me about the birds and the bees when I was 12.  I went from living at home to having two roommates to living with my husband. I realized that I could no longer depend on my dad the way I used to, now I had a life long partner.   The only man I ever trusted was my father.  I knew that no matter what happened at the end of the day he was going to love me and protect me.  Would the new man in my life do the same? Would he love me enough to deal with my imperfections?  It was so hard for me to believe that this new man could love me so much after so many didn't.  So far marriage is all that I've wanted it to be.  I realize that not every day is going to be perfect but communication, respect and compromise are key.  I'm learning not to dwell in the past, instead learn from it and move forward.  I hope that our bond grows stronger, that we always see the good in each other and that we love hard.  Isn't that all we want? Love? Someone to love us?

Cutie Pie

I don't know whose little guy this is but I want one, a French Bulldog! I found this pic on the internet (bayareadogs.net)  We have to meet him first.  Maybe one day.  *sigh*