Feelings

I've decided to take one day at a time.  I've realized that the only certainty in my future is it's uncertainty.  Sometimes I wake up and I can't believe I'm living such a fulfilling life and I'm so happy, so why do I feel so anxious and sad? Am I scared?  Today I realized that one day I am going to die and I can't fear death anymore.  I'm fearful that I won't be ready and it scares me but I've realized that there's no point in worrying now.  I am healthy and I am happy.   That's all that matters.  My family is happy, my friends are happy , no one is sick.  I should be thankful and be living life to the fullest instead of worrying so much about a future that doesn't exist yet.  I don't want to worry my life away and not enjoy the things around me.  I want to have a family and I want to travel.  I can't let myself get in the way of those things.  A friend used to tell me that I was so emotional and fragile because I never dealt with any hardship in life, I don't think that's true.  I think we all deal with life's punches differently and sometimes certain things affect us more than others.  I am a bit more sensitive and emotional but I realized that those traits have made me more empathetic, and I have learned to enjoy and appreciate things a little more.  I want to have a sound mind and heart.  I should try yoga but I get so anxious during yoga! I feel like I am not breathing properly and I get really light headed.  Each day is so much better than the day before and I have learned to control my feelings a lot better.  I am so happy these days and so grateful.  I need to stop looking for the negative things in life and just focus on the positive.  :)

Adventures in Babysitting

I babysat my 4 year old niece and my 3 year old nephew today.  It was pretty fun actually.  I don't believe in sitting a kid in front of the television to keep them quiet so I tried to come up with activities.  Well, it turns out I had no activities.  I wasn't prepared because my husband asked me 40 minutes before they were being dropped off but I didn't mind.  No activities in a not kid friendly home.  What to do? I didn't want them just watching tv or sitting in front of the computer.  I couldn't take them anywhere because I have no car seats.  So what did we do for 3.5 hours?! They brought some toys so that was good but after about 20 minutes they were bored. Then the greatest idea occurred to me: Let's make cookies! That kept us occupied for the majority of the time.  They had so much fun! We had to mix the dough and let it chill, then we used snowflake cookie cutters to cut them out.  In between we watched a little bit of iCarly and Sponge Bob square pants.  All in all it was a good 3.5 hours.  We were entertained.  Then my hubby and my inlaws came home and we watched the Super Bowl.  The kids left around 10 pm.  I was so tired after it all! That was just 3.5 hours, imagine if it were 24 hours 7 days a week? AHH! Soon it will be my turn, maybe.  Hopefully.  :)

The look for less

My inspiration for Saturday Night was Stella McCartney's Lucia dress.  The Lucia dress retailed at $2,155 on net-a-porter.com.  A little pricey for me.  I opted for a dress that I purchased late last year on sale for $26.   I paired it with Kelsi Dagger pumps, a Balenciaga clutch, Nadri earrings, BCBG two finger ring and David Yurman bracelet.

My inspiration:

My look: